Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Over the Edge

The photo on the right (h/t Deadspin and the San-Diego Union Leader) isn't recent. It's from 2005. It's also not terribly new or novel to crack on New England Fan, much in the same way that it's not new or novel to crack on Tom Cruise, Britney Spears or neo-Nazis. (For the record, this blog isn't afraid to note its opposition to all three, and our pride in having been against all three since "Rain Man.") And yet, still, this needs to be said.

Any sports fan of a certain age has, I am sure, gotten the occasional burst of static as to how they are just great big nerds for being so into stuff that is clearly meaningless. (This is multiplied if you play fantasy sports.) As my three-sport fantasy addiction, my pilgrimages to live games as quasi-vacations, and this blog shows, I'm more addicted than most. And yet...

I've never painted myself. Or gotten anything pierced or tattooed. Or paid a scalper. I haven't called a talk radio show for over 15 years, or listened to one in 2. I don't go on bulletin boards to defend my team. I don't memorize statistics. Since moving to the East Coast in June of 2006, I've gone to nearly as many live theater or music performances as I have to games. I don't speak in the third person when discussing my team, unless I'm trying to make fun of people who do.

Also, I think if you are doing most of the above, there is a strong possibility that you are a freaking moron. But what the hell, I spend my free time blogging about sports for pennies on the hour, so who am I to talk?

At some very basic level, sports is a vice. It's time you could be spending with your family, working, exercising, doing charitable works or even just getting enough sleep. It's money that you could be putting aside for more meaningful pursuits, or investments that will have a greater return on investment than chewing gum. I'm an Eagles, A's and Sixers fan; I may spend the rest of my life waiting for a championship that will never come.

Will Leitch at Deadspin likes to talk about how sports fans are smarter, on average, than expected -- and that it's just that freaks on the right get the camera time. I'd like to believe that; there are enough smart sports blogs and commenters. But at some point, there's got to be some face time for those of us that aren't yahoos and don't fall for braying jackass fake controversy shows, right?

(Crickets. Sweat on upper lip. More crickets.)

And we'll be back with which team has the sluttier cheerleaders and/or wives, complete with videos and images, so come on back, y'all!


Tracer Bullet said...

I think you meant first person, but why quibble?

DMtShooter said...

We are above quibbling, but you, clearly, are not. (Whoops.)

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