Sunday, January 18, 2009

Top 10 Super Bowl Stories I'd Like To See

Let the hype begin! Media members, consider this a public service of stories for you to pitch to your corporate overlords in the next few days. I'm a giver.

10) A deity-by-deity breakdown showing which teams the major world gods are supporting

9) What's involved in Matt Leinart's game preparation

8) How the Cowboys will get press coverage this time

7) Heart-wrenching profiles of prop bet only problem gamblers

6) How a company that didn't advertise in the Super Bowl telecast did better, since they were able to spend millions of dollars in a more useful way than 30 seconds of trying to amuse people

5) That some musician that's playing the event isn't actually any kind of a football fan

4) How a region doesn't really improve when their town wins, since I'm pretty sure that Pittsburgh's turnaround had more to do with Carnegie-Mellon than Bill Cowher

3) A telling piece on how many of our Armed Forces overseas don't care that much, because they (a) aren't Steeler or Cardinals Fans, and (b) just want to go the hell home

2) That Troy Polamalu and Adrian Wilson have a side bet on how many concussions they can deal out

1) How the Steelers don't even remember that Ken Whisenhunt was on their staff, since his contribution was so marginal


J-Red said...

Ok, Number 9 is why Comedy Central needs to get back into sports. Am I the only person that thought Offsides with Dom Irrera was a good concept?

DMtShooter said...

Didn't see it, but hell and yes on someone actually following Leinart around. Leftwich probably actually prepares, given how Ben likes to have "I'm Hurt!" drama once a game...

Anonymous said...

Fuck Number 9. He's Hurt.

DMtShooter said...

Let's just say that the timing of Mr. Leinart's injuries is somewhat, well, interesting.

Anonymous said...

OMG!~ This is the best Super Bowl story I've seen!:
"Why Rick's Cabaret dancer Samantha Couldn't Cheerlead for the Arizona Cardinals

The Super Bowl this Sunday might have been a lot sexier if Samantha, one of Rick's Cabaret NYC's beautiful exotic dancers, had won her audition for a cheerleading position with the Arizona Cardinals. “They told me my boobs were too big!” she clarified. Luckily, Samantha found her way to Rick's, where this particular “condition” is considered a most welcome attribute. Samantha, along with 99 other beauties, will be working the Super Bowl party Sunday at Rick's Cabaret, 50 West 33rd Street.
The Rick's Girls will be wearing cheerleader outfits and skimpy football jerseys--but not for long!
The club will show the game on its HD flat screen TVs on all three floors, and offer a free buffet and drink specials all night. The club's VIP deluxe suites are available for "high rollers."

Incidentally, Samantha has no hard feelings, and is rooting for the Cardinals to win."

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