Friday, May 7, 2010

Top 10 takeaways from the Milton Bradley restriction

The slugger who puts the trou in troubled asked his current club, the Seattle Mariners, for help in dealing with "emotional stress" from personal issues. He's now on something called the restricted list, which means he's off the team for five days, and can't have contact. Here's what you need to know...

10) His stress seems to involve hitting .214 with a sub .700 OPS

9) 32 is really a young age for a mid-life crisis

8) Moving Andre Ethier for him is just looking better and better for Oakland, aka three teams ago

7) When your manager feels that you are not fit to play anymore, crying "Stress!" might just be your best career move

6) Maybe Milton's terrible year in Chicago wasn't entirely the fault of the team, the media, or the curse of some goat

5) Maybe his personal counselor can get him to stop looking at center-cut fastballs for strike three

4) "Miltdown" is fast becoming the go-to phrase of choice for when an MLBer really, really screws the pooch

3) Amazingly, Milton is owned in 4.7% of ESPN fantasy leagues, which I can only assume is proof that many fantasy leaguers have strong senses of humor

2) Never has so much been endured by so many for a guy with 117 HRs in 11 years in the bigs

1) Historians will have absolutely no idea how to explain this career, or why eight different teams paid him over $33 million dollars to occasionally play baseball

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