Sunday, January 23, 2011

Top 10 NFL Conference Championship Ad Questions

10) Does any person on the planet who does not work for Budweiser care how their little Western movie teaser ends, and how on God's green earth does this sell beer?

9) How does running into television screens sell beer?

8) How does a family of goobers wearing matching clothes equate to a better-than-nature family, and how does this lead to people buying Microsoft products?

7) Why does Farmers' Insurance send its agents to a college campus to learn disturbingly personal details about their customers?

6) Do the bitchtastic Bud Light bartenders ever get tips, or do they just work for the chance to abuse non-conformists?

5) Since the Visa Super Bowl lifer guys are so adamant about missing important family events for their need to spend huge dollars on a game that has to rarely, if ever, involve their teams, doesn't this make me kind of a selfish twat for using my Visa card?

4) Can't Southwest's kangaroo court put the evil CEO in jail, rather than just make him saunter out?

3) Has anyone actually stared at a clock to measure out the countdown before a Verizon iPhone purchase?

2) Why is Burger King embedding sinister ingredient chunks into burgers, rather than, you know, giving people the option to order burgers with actual food items that are those ingredients?

1) Do I have to be a dancy fancy pants to purchase the new VW Jetta?

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