Friday, April 29, 2011

Top 10 signs you've been watching too much playoff basketball

10) You can no longer tell the difference between Reggie Miller and Cheryl Miller

9) You have sympathy for Dick Stockton's struggles in figuring out what's happening and staying awake

8) You no longer have the energy to mock Kenny Smith for having his own basketball holodeck

7) When listening to the local telecasts on NBA TV, you've stopped counting how many times the announcing team uses the word "we"

6) You can tell sideline reporters apart, even when they aren't dressed like Repressed Tranny Craig Sager

5) It's become quite apparent that you will have to hunt down and kill any number of cast members from TNT's upcoming schedule of dramas, if only to stop the voices in your head telling you to kill kill kill kill kill

4) You really want to move to the average NBA player's routine of afternoon naps, since these 2am East Coast finishes are just a problem

3) Some part of you is happy when a series ends early, despite the lurking (LURKING!) fear of lockout

2) You can say the post-game cliches before the players do

1) The TNT studio crew seems like the smartest, funniest and best people on television, if only because they aren't the NBA.TV or ESPN clowns

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