Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Top 10 Things John Steigerwald Apparently Believes

Winning the one-time battle for page views by taking an indefensible and revolting position, Pittsburgh's John Steigerwald decided today to blame the victim in the case of Bryan Stow, a 42-year-old paramedic and father of two who was beaten into a coma for the sin of wearing a Giants' jersey to a Dodger game on April 1.

You see, Stow's choice of apparel was so confrontational and ill-conceived, he deserved abuse.

No, seriously.

Link withheld on a matter of principle. But not the following list...

10) Assaulting women is probably also OK, assuming they are also wearing enemy colors

9) If it costs a life to end the scourge of middle-aged guys wearing jerseys, that's an acceptable price to pay

8) Bad fan behavior is clearly caused by apparel, rather than rising ticket prices in a falling economy, a failure of the education system, or any other factor

7) Asking hypothetical questions to a person in a medically induced coma isn't, well, a sign that the writer is clinically insane

6) Newspapers should pay writers for pieces that generate page views, even if those page viewers are one-time only visitors who are nearly universally appalled

5) Guys who paint their faces scare athletes, and that somehow matters more than violent assault

4) There exists a magical age where wearing jerseys turns from cute to an affront

3) If you get dressed in that shirt in the locker room, and the shirt has your name on it, it's magically delicious

2) Kicking a man when he's in a down can be done in print just as well as at the stadium

1) Posting the most loathsome thing you can think of after a near-tragedy just means you have the courage to tell it like it is

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