Thursday, April 7, 2011

Top Ten Reasons Why The Rays Are Winless

Since this worked so well for the Red Sox the other day, let's move on to the other AL East cellar dweller...

10) For some reason, imported ancient outfielders making a pittance of their previous salary who play in front of small and disinterested crowds don't perform up to their career norms

9) It turns out that turning over the entire bullpen in one off-season might not be a great idea

8) As soon as a writer cranks out a book about a small market team's success, that team is doomed

7) It turns out that Jason Bartlett was the key to everything

6) While batting average may not be a particularly meaningful statistic in judging offensive performance, having a team hit .136 over five games isn't good

5) Evan Longoria missing three weeks, rather than improving while still a young player, doesn't help

4) While the team is not counting on a ton of offense from their catchers, going 1 for 16 with one walk isn't really helping, either

3) Letting Carlos Pena and Carl Crawford go might have sent something of a message to the team's non-white players

2) Counting on the young starting pitchers to do everything isn't very fair in a league where the pitchers don't hit

1) Clearly, it's Baltimore and Toronto's turn to become the new favorite team of everyone outside of the New York to Boston corridor

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