Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Top 10 reasons why the NFL lockout hasn't settled yet

10) League is too busy lining up an 8-game early-season Thursday night TV package to further dilute Sundays, and infuriate fantasy players

9) Fantasy football industry hasn't sent them enough kidneys and corneas

8) What's another few weeks/months/years when there's blood money on the line

7) It's not as if the heavily compromised media is calling out the league for taking its sweet time about things

6) Gives everyone a chance to fall in love with Wimbledon all over again

5) Every time they get close to a deal, realize that it's just more fun to keep jerking people around

4) Lawyers bill by the hour, you know

3) League is convinced that these special arbitrator's uniforms and collectibles will sell if they just give it enough time

2) Small towns that host summer training camps haven't taken it badly enough just yet

1) Every day the lockout continues, an angel gets head trauma

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