Sunday, November 13, 2011

50 Eagles - Cardinals Takeaways: The Most Hated Team In Eagle History

There was a story this week over how Michael Vick is the most disliked player in the NFL, which is hardly surprising given the felony past. But the nasty little secret is that Eagle Fan feels the same way by now. Let's wallow, shall we?

50) On fourth and two in the first quarter to set the tone of the game, it's not like you want to have your best player, LeSean McCoy, get anywhere near the ball

49) Shockingly, the Cardinals targeted Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie, seeing how they have seen him play and all

48) Jay Feely's field goal kicking is nearly as good as his politics

47) With Jeremy Maclin down due to injury, DeSean Jackson suspended for the game in what promises to be a season-ending move if he's got any brains, and Vick throwing the ball like his Bad News days, Coach For Life Andy Reid felt compelled to... throw every down

46) Back to back 3 and outs with drops and wide-open missing passes, and a 3 for 9 start from Vick, means you really can't possibly call running plays

45) If you have 1 minute left in the first quarter in today's pool for inexplicable offensive timeout, you win... and the subsequent false start for the bonus also paid out

44) Under the header of silver linings, the coverage units seem solid now

43) The Wide Nine technique clearly causes defensive ends to jump offsides

42) DRC actually got a sack, since it's not as if he's got any business staying downfield and running with WRs

41) Steve Smith tried to get out of a fumbled punt by punching it out of bounds from the middle of the field, and no, I am not making any of that up

40) In related news, Smith is now back in contention with Ronnie Brown and Vince Young for worst free agent signing of 2011, though to be fair, every single free agent signed is still in the running

39) After blowing a fourth down early, Reid called for a punt from the Cardinal 40, which kind of underscored the correct level of confidence in the offense

38) Asante Samuel's TAInt was really more about John Skelton, but beggars can't be choosers

37) That's the second straight game where the Eagle defense has scored a touchdown, if you are still in the business of looking for hope, and if that's the case, please stop abusing prescription drugs

36) On the bright side, we'll all be able to stop watching ths team in the minimum amount of time required

35) Perhaps covering Larry Fitzgerald with a LB in the red zone might not be the strongest indictment of Juan Castillo's prowess as a defensive coordinator, but it's pretty high up there

34) Dick Stockton noted how quiet the crowd was, failing to realize that most Eagle Fans are not idiots, so we stopped caring enough to yell about this team a long time ago

33) Vick's day would have been even worse, if not for a bailout holding call and the best challenge of CFL Reid's life

32) Jason Avant must be very happy by now, since there is absolutely no bandwagon fans left

31) McCoy continues to be the single unquestioned positive for this club

30) I've seen Vick play worse games in the laundry, but never against this weak of a defense

29) You know the game has turned into a snoozefest when the analysis goes to how tall King Dunlap is

28) Ken Whisenhunt's prolonged monologue got an intentional grounding call on a play where the Cardinals jumped offsides, on yet another Green 3 and out

27) Derek Landri's two-hand shove sack technique isn't sound, but it's what passes for fun in this laundry

26) Vick goes for a hard count on every third and 1, which really isn't helping anything in its predictability

25) Keeping Vick in the pocket also means that you have a short QB who's prone to turnover issues where the largest players are

24) The red zone pick late in the third quarter meant that this week's late defensive collapse won't take as long

23) The tall lineman matchup was referenced to something called the NBA, which history books tell me was a pro basketball league that played in this hemisphere

22) Jaiquan Jarrett showed why he's a DB, and not a WR

21) This week's awful Nnamdi Asomugha play in the fourth quarter is lining up offsides on what would have been a stop

20) Given that this happens every week, you'd think the Eagle defense would look less surprised by the fourth quarter collapse

19) Since Feely missed two easy field goals early, this fourth quarter blown lead really isn't as notable as the others

18) Dick Stockton called the Philadelphia crowd stunned, when the better description is apathetic, resigned or disgusted

16) After the second Vick interception, I honestly wondered if we might be better off with Vince Young or Mike Kafka... but in the continuing signs that we're living in Bizarro End Times, he got bailed on by the best replay challenge of Coach For Life Reid's career

15) Smith's inability to just turn it upfield and get a first down was grounds for immediate release, as if he hasn't given us ample cause before that

14) Asomugha got an absolute gift on his pick late in the game

13) The Cardinals would have won this game without drama if they had a kicker or their starting QB

12) Amazingly, the Eagles had Young hand off, rather than throw an awful pick

11) Jamar Cheney's sack was the first by a linebacker this year, and no, I'm serious

10) Going for it on fourth and two with 3:45 left seemed odd, but Whisnenhunt had clearly seen enough tape of the Eagle defense in the fourth quarter

9) The fact that Fitzgerald was, once again, not covered by Asomugha with two minutes left tells you all you need to know about Castillo's prowess

8) At this point, you have to wonder how the Eagles care enough to get a fourth quarter lead in the first place

7) Given an Eagles Fan a ticket to a game right now constitues a hate crime

6) Now that the season is over, I'm hoping we can start playing backups, since that's always fun

5) Brent Celek gets called "the normally reliable" every time he drops a ball, which is to say he's called that every game

4) Vick's arm punt pick to end things was apologized for by John Lynch, for some reason

3) Though to be fair, Smith jogging after that ball was also awfully inspiring

2) CFL Reid called a timeout to make the Cardinals kneel twice, and to give the remaining diehard sadoo-masochists a little more time to boo

1) There's no danger of CFL Reid losing this team, since he never actually had them in the first place

1 comment:

Tracer Bullet said...

Steve Smith is either a double agent or revenge for the Giants signing of the Andrews brothers.

Ads In This Size Rule