Sunday, February 5, 2012

40 Giants-Patriots Super Bowl Takeaways

40) If you want to kill the Patriots defense, just tell them that every down is third

39) Shaun Weather- ford is very, very excited about punting

38) Brady took an intentional grounding for safety, just to ruin everyone's prop bet

37) The Patriot defense can force turnovers, but only with 12 men on the field

36) NBC didn't want to show Victor Cruz dancing after a touchdown right away, but eventually capitulated to America's demands, rather than the need to document Eli Manning jogging away

35) The first 11.5 minutes were so bad, New England Fan got off the bandwagon even faster than usual

34) Brady tried to concuss Jason Pierre-Paul to get him out of the game on a third down in the red zone

33) Brandon Jacobs is very excited about runs that should not excite people very much

32) Hakeem Nicks makes Eli Manning look a lot better than he is

31) NBC wants you all to know that being able to walk around Indianapolis in February makes this a great venue

30) For as good as the Giants played for the first 26 minutes, it didn't take much to lose the lead

29) The Giants' defense had every advantage going into the final drive of the half, and still gave up a 98-yard touchdown drive

28) On the off chance that you didn't have enough awareness of the homo-eroticism inherent in football, Madonna reminded us all

27) They clearly took some air out of the kicking balls to provoke actual returns in this game

26) Chad Ochocinco actually made a play

25) Brady broke a Joe Montana Super Bowl record, just to make us all hate him a little more

24) Aaron Hernandez proved that the Giants are going to struggle against the TE, even if it's not against the nominal #1

23) The Giants finally sacked Brady for the first time with 21 minutes left in the game, though the grounding safety probably should count as one as well

22) Nicks had a fumble that was recovered for a ha - yuge play

21) When Jacobs is rolling up first downs, it's really not a good sign for Patriot opponents

20) If Bear Pascoe isn't a porn name, I'm an airplane

19) If you found the first three quarters kind of dull, I ain't gonna lie, I nodded off for a while there myself

18) As the bizarre INT shows, Gronkowski is no David Tyree

17) If the Patriots wound up losing this game, Patriot Fan can cry hard about lucky fumble bounces and penalties

16) The idea that Eli has become a clutch fourth quarter performer, courageous in the face of a pass rush, and durable as hell is immensely disappointing, really

15) Speaking as an Eagles fan, this game really needed more injuries and blimp bombings

14) Mario Manningham blew a big gain, and cost Blue a critical timeout, by having no concept of the sideline

13) I'm pretty sure there was a crowd at this game, but it was mostly a rumor

12) If you want to get away with defensive pass interference, it really helps to wear a Patriot jersey

11) Danny Woodhead has super scamper power in open space

10) Brady to Hernandez to convert 3rd and 3 with five minutes left was not as important as NBC hyped it to be

9) Welker didn't have enough heart, chutzpah, scrapping and character to make the game-ending catch with four minutes left

8) Manningham redeemed himself, then inspired NBC to find Tyree on the sidelines, just to further the dagger into Patriot Fan

7) Eli hurrying to the line caused Belichick to blow a timeout on a replay challenge that was positively Reid-esque

6) Belichick failed to put Julian Edelman on Manningham late in this game

5) If we can tell the story about Ahmad Bradshaw's touchdown later on as New England just quitting, rather than a brilliant strategic move, that would work fine for me

4) Branch and Hernandez dropping back to back passes showed just a wee bit of nerves

3) Brady converting the fourth and 16 is another one of those If Only He Had WRs moments

2) If you are covering the field with seconds left, you should probably just put 45 men on the field, rather than 12

1) As a Patriots hater, I really wanted Gronkowski to drop the Hail Mary in the end zone to end it

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