Friday, February 24, 2012

Top 10 reasons why Ryan Braun won his drug suspension appeal

10) The urine sample in question ws not absolutely, positively delivered overnight

9) Law of averages says that eventually there has to be an MLB MVP that isn't dirty

8) Matching the local clothing, music and food, steroids have not yet actually made it to Milwaukee

7) As is usual when MLB's process is shown to an outside observer, the outside observer rejected MLB utterly

6) The prayers of the nation's fantasy baseball players were answered

5) For once, a leaked report actually hurt management

4) Since Prince Fielder is gone, arbitrator decided that Milwaukee has already suffered enough

3) Braun completely broke the profile of explosive offensive growth, recurring injuries and lawyering up

2) Getting off on a technicality is, after all, the new American dream

1) As Manny Ramirez is sure to note any minute now, Braun has the wrong skin color for suspensions

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