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9) Does drinking Bud Light give you the license to squat in stranger's homes?
8) Is anyone else a little bit disturbed by the fact that Domino's spent three years working on dough, since that pretty much guarantees that their dough is some kind of Frankensteinian nightmare substance?
7) Are HBO Go subscribers required to have tablets and slap fights?
6) How out of touch does Hollywood have to be to imagine that Eagle Fan can have Jennifer Lawrence as a girlfriend?
5) How many people watching an NFL game have the ability to hire an IBEW worker?
4) Why does Verizon want to make getting FiOS sound like they have some kind of disease?
3) Are the children who appear in the annual Hess ads kept in storage to ensure freshness in every year's commercial?
2) Why do Nissan drivers endanger their families by following random lunatics into unsafe off-road conditions?
1) If you leave a steak house for a Taco Bell to eat off the hood of your car, doesn't your next move have to be heroin?