Wednesday, January 30, 2013

If You Have To Say It, That Says It All

Work The Rubes, Boys
Two brief points about today's Super Bowl Media Day layups...

1) Ray Lewis denies PED use

I was never really a Michael Jordan fan. I knew I was watching the best player of his generation and one of the best of all time, and I rooted for him when he played teams that I hated more than his Bulls... but in terms of rooting for him, there was always a meanness, an inhumanity, and a sense that I was watching, well, a bad person, one that would do anything possible to secure victory. And the biggest manifestation of that was the way he'd pule, hector, harass and just flat out work the refs. In an age of guys who'd put heel wrestlers to shame with their denials of personal culpability, Jordan took it to a ridiculous level. You knew you were watching history, but you also knew that unless you were a Bulls fan, or a fan of by any means possible victory, you knew that this history wasn't fun, or good, or something that should really be encouraged.

And his post-NBA career of Hitler mustaches, worst ever general managing, and that horrific Hall of Fame speech? Well, let's just say that I'm not going to be the last guy in the world who got off the MJ Train.

Now, Ray Lewis denying PED use... is basically the same story, only without the dunks. Or the good ads, or being made to appear fun by hanging out with Spike Lee and Bugs Bunny. (Both of whom totally carried MJ. But I digress.)

And the fact that this kind of opinion on The Mouth Of God's Own Linebacker is never shared on the tee vee tells you...

There's never been a player who uses the media better than Lewis.

Ever.

To the point of that whole Stabby Stabby thing going away faster than Kobe Bryant getting out of Colorado.

And the fact that the general public seems to understand this, but the media never points it out...

Well, it tells you a little bit about the quality of minds that enter journalism these days, no?

Oh, and one last little thing in re Ray Ray... if you have to deny PED use, that pretty much puts you in the same camp with the people who deny hating gays.

And we all know what comes next in the God Enjoys Irony spin cycle...

2) Randy Moss thinks very highly of Randy Moss

Good ol' Ten Full Speed Efforts A Week WR told the second-tier mics that weren't drinking the Ray Ray Kool Aid today that he thinks he is the greatest to ever play the position.

Well, isn't that, um, unprecedented?

I mean, I guess it's news that Moss thinks too highly of himself even years past his role as anything but a situational decoy, and fails to see how his ringless history and widespread waste of unspeakable physical talent makes him, well, a guy that will be forgotten with speed as soon as he's no longer on an NFL roster.

Because, well, I can rattle off a dozen names without even trying very hard, in terms of guys I'd rather have than Moss.

And one of those names is his teammate, Michael Crabtree, who is no better than a reasonable presence in most people's fantasy league line up...

Because, well, Crabtree might be just about to prove that he's something that Moss never has been.

Which is... the WR1 on a Super Bowl winning team. (Thanks again, David Tyree.)

If you have to say that you are the greatest -- at anything -- you aren't. That's why it's called history, and not mestory...

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