Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Top 10 reasons why the Clippers aren't bringing back Vinny del Negro

Oh, The Pain, The Pain
10) Just realized they were, in fact, employing Vinny del Negro

9) Have to make sure that we continue to distract the world from the fact that Blake Griffin, despite being a very well-paid commercial spokesmodel and well-known superstar with hops for days, does not get rebounds or block shots

8) del Negro failed to give Chauncey Billups the memo that he's, well, not very good any more, and shouldn't shoot so much

7) Team feel that he didn't get enough out of DeAndre Jordan and Lamar Odom, who, shockingly, did not combine to be a championship level center

6) Winning the Pacific Division crown used to seem like a much bigger deal, really

5) Needed to fire him quickly before the world started calling him what he really is, which is the most successful coach in Clippers History

4) Desperate to do anything that makes Chris Paul like them and stay, up to just making him the official, as well as unofficial, coach

3) Vinny just isn't racist or repulsive enough to be trusted by management

2) Like every other franchise in the NBA, the Clips are convinced that if they just have an open spot, Phil Jackson will magically appear

1) Just like in Brooklyn, this team is far too talented (just ask them!) to ever lose on its own, so it must be all about the coach

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