Monday, May 27, 2013

Top 10 takwaways from Adrian Peterson's stance against marriage equality

Separate, Not Equal
10) The RB doesn't believe in gay marriage, which means that he doesn't believe in something that will be the law of the land in his state in about 65 days

9) He knows that the Vikings didn't release Chris Kluwe for his support for the issue, because the Vikings always tell him why they release players

8) AP loves and respects his gay relatives, except for, you know, treating them like the rest of society

7) He's not biased against gay people, despite, well, showing this bias against gay people

6) Peterson says to each his own, assuming, of course, that some don't get to have the each

5) Judging by the past history of public figures who have come out against marriage equality, you are more than justified in assuming that Peterson is closeted, not that there's anything wrong with that

4) Since there are no gay people in the NFL, this won't cause Peterson any problems in pile-ups or team meetings

3) No, seriously, there are no gay people in the NFL, honest, no fooling, move along now you, nothing to see here

2) I don't know about you, but as a white guy, I always find it oddly uplifting when African-Americans engage in bigotry against a minority

1) At no point during the interview was Peterson struck mute by the  cognitive dissonance of what he was saying, or bathed in the warm glow and love of an intolerant God, because that's just the way the universe works

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