Monday, December 30, 2013

Top 10 NFL Week 17 Takeaways

Fourth and Killshot
10) Six out of eight division winners took care of business easily, which means that the league is coming way too predictable

9) With a dominating win on the road in Miami, Rex Ryan earned the opportunity to win the back page of the tabloids for yet another year

8) Baltimore failed to make the playoffs in its Super Bowl defense year, despite getting four picks in a road game, mostly because Joe Flacco was somehow even worse

7) Detroit (hopefully) ended the Jim Schwartz Era with a 1-point loss where they were flagged for more penalty yards than their opponent, which is to say, they went out in their usual style

6) Houston and Matt Schaub earned the right to pick a top QB in the upcoming draft by locking up the top pick with diligent suckery

5) Pittsburgh started 2-6, ended 6-2, and missed the playoffs by a couple of plays that Yinzer Fan is going to grouse about for years to come

4) For a long period of utterly unacceptable time, the only live football game for the entire nation was the Giants and DC game that God could not stop peeing on

3) Cleveland was so impressed by the first season of Rob Chudzinski that they couldn't imagine giving him another

2) Chicago had so many chances to win the NFC North, they were pretty much required to lose it

1) Nearly every game mattered today for something, which is an amazing by-product of an incredibly compacted and random league

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