Tuesday, July 1, 2014

Top 10 takeaways from Lane Johnson getting busted for PEDs

Oh Crap
Second-year Eagles OL Lane Johnson faces a four-game suspension for running afoul of the NFL's performance enhancing drug policy. Here's all you need to know...

10) The suspension is going to have many more plays than an average offense

9) Thankfully, Johnson doesn't hang around with gang members, otherwise this might become a real problem

8) Some portion of the fan base is ready to blame or credit this to Mike Vick, because some portion of the fan base is ready to blame or credit Vick for damn near anything

7) Feel free to downgrade Shady McCoy in your fantasy league, especially if you are in a league with me

6) Luckily, Eagle Fan is very even-keeled and ready to get over such small hiccups in the road, without dealing in defeatism or over-reaction

5) As the last two years of Eagle football shows, continuity in the offensive line is kind of a big deal

4) The suspension will cost Johnson four game checks, or just over $116K, which the club will turn into some more windmills on top of the stadium, so, um, yay, I guess

3) This may be Allen Barbre's big break, which is great news for all of you who own him in your deep-roster OL-only fantasy league

2) As Johnson is relatively new to the OL position, one has to assume that he'll get better at hiding his dope

1) Speaking as an Eagles fan, we're doomed, doomed, doomed I tell you, doomed

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