|Happy Christmas Auto Payments|
9) Are the people dressed in Star Wars garb at Subway also pedophiles?
8) How much better would Samuel L. Jackson's credit card ads be if he shot people after quoting Biblical verses?
7) Is creepy personal serenading from a keyboardist a way for Wal-Mart to encourage online buying?
6) How much free time does Peyton Manning have for holiday decorations?
5) Are Lincolns plagued by shrapnel?
4) Can the Cricket mucus blobs stop stripping, and how does that sell phones?
3) Are United Healthcare's patients idiots who routinely punch meat?
2) Do Exxon's scientists fist bump robots often, and if so, how much does that drive up their health care costs?
1) Are the children of Mercedes' owners prone to hysteria from their parents on Christmas morning every year?